And it’s not the statute of a black horse with a lampshade on its head (though I was rather fascinated when I saw it). I am referring to a far better and even more intriguing gift than that: presence.
Yes, I am talking about You! Your (truest) presence is a present. Quality time and attention is the best gift we can give to just about anyone.
Think of this a moment: what does a teen who’s acting out, a spouse delivering the silent treatment for no apparent reason and a screaming toddler all have in common? They all want at least one thing – the attention of somebody important to them. Many of us do not feel we get enough of this precious commodity from the people closest to us. We, in turn, may not be giving enough of our own time away either.
There’s a recent heart-warming example of selfless attention (despite the hardest challenges) that was extended by my late sister-friend’s daughter who put everything in her life down and moved to Washington, D.C. to support her mother’s medical assistance in dying choice. That is the toughest presence most of us would ever have to make. Most of us have far easier gifts of presence we can make every single day.
During these holiday seasons is a great time to share brief stories, ideas, and life experiences within our multi-generational gatherings.
For my part, I would like to share with them some of the gems I received in my late teens – a foundation that continues to light my path. And I’m curious to learn from their wealth of intergenerational perspectives too. Some of it may go in one ear and out the other – after all, it is Christmas day! However, it is not very often we have our closest family and friends around us… I know that I’ll be listening.
We can make sharing ourselves part of our gifts to them. And accept all they share in the same light (though these are practices that are for life and not just holidays).
Don’t wait for challenges to slow you or them down. Take the time to be a little more patient and available.
There is no time like now.
Merry Christmas,
